“Woman? Is that meant to insult me?”
And here, the biggest lesson of them all, and a summation of all the problems.
You are in the way of your story.
Hard truth: writing is actually not that important.
Writing is a mechanism.
It’s an inelegant middleman to what we do. It’s a shame, in some ways, that we even call ourselves writers, because it describes only the mechanical act of what we do. It’s a vital mechanism, sure, but by describing it as the prominent thing, it tends to suggest, well, prominence.
But our writing must serve story.
Story does not serve writing.
This is cart-before-horse stuff, but important to realize.
Listen, in what we do there exist three essential participants.
The tale, the teller of the tale, and the listener of the tale.
Story. Author. And audience.
You are two-thirds of that equation. You are the story (or, by proxy, its architect) and the teller of the story. The telling of the story is most often done through writing — through that mechanical act, and because it’s the act you can sit and watch, it’s the one that is used to describe our role. I AM WRITER, you say, and so you focus so much on the actual writing you forget that there’s this other invisible — but altogether more critical — part, which is what you’re writing.
So, what happens is, early on, you put so much on the page. You write and write and write and use too many words and too much exposition and big meaty paragraphs and at the end all it serves to do is create distance between the tale and the listener of the tale.
It keeps the audience at arm’s length.
Quit that shit.
Bring the audience into the story. This is at the heart of show, don’t tell — which is a rule that can and should be broken at times, but at its core remains a reasonable notion: don’t talk at, don’t preach, don’t lecture, don’t fill their time with unnecessary wordsmithy.
Get. To. The. Point."
I think the “women are mysterious” thing can also come from:
1) Women actually being quite clear, but not telling men what they want to hear. ”She said she doesn’t want to talk to me? So many mixed messages and confusing signals!”
2) Women not having cheat codes. ”I tried being nice, and she didn’t have sex with me. I tried being an asshole, and she didn’t have sex with me. Come on, there’s got to be some kind of solution to this puzzle!”
3) Women not being a hive mind. ”First a woman told me that she likes guys with big muscles. Then the very next day a woman told me she thinks muscles aren’t attractive at all. Make up your mind, women!”
4) An individual woman doing something confusing, and instead of asking “why is she doing this now?” men ask “why do women always do this?”
The Rules of Social Anxiety
1. Walk with eyes fixed on the ground
They are watching, laughing, judging
Don’t focus on it too much or you will stumble and be made a fool of
2. Look like you are writing and busy in class
avoid being called on
you know the answer but what if you stutter or mumble
What if they tell you “speak up I can’t hear you”
3. Don’t make a noise
hold in that cough that sneeze that breathe
people will hear you
do not draw attention to yourself like that
4. Spend time every night before you go to bed to think
Think about all the embarrassing things you have ever done
Everyone remembers, that’s all they remember
5. Never enter a room full of people
They all look
Why are you here?
Why are you alive?
6. Your friends all secretly hate you
you know why they didn’t reply to your text
you know how they all dread seeing you
you are only put up with because of pity
7. Always be scared
Scared to sit next to a stranger
Scared to see someone you know
Scared eat in front of people
Scared to talk on the phone
Scared to go to social events
Scared order at a restaurant
Scared to talk
Scared to have a panic attack
Scared to be noticed
but don’t worry,
you don’t like people anyway,
at least that’s what you say,
You don’t even care what they think, people are annoying,
that’s what you tell them.
You play it off as a joke
but really you’re always scared.
Anonymous (via cassy005)
|jk rowling’s reasoning as to why fenrir greyback turned remus into a werewolf:||remus’s father insulted him so he did it as an act of revenge|
|the actual reason greyback bit remus:||the temptation to succumb to the fact that biting remus whose name literally means ‘werewolf mcwerewolf’ would be the greatest feat in lycanthropic irony the world had ever seen|